Words won't just describe what I feel right now.
Well, I've never been into a serious relationship, you know that too rite?
Maybe some friends have felt being friendzoned by me too. Sorry, I, as a woman, doesn't really catch the hints you guys giving it to me.
From primary school, I direct my life to wholy focus on study, for a better future. I just do not want to care about whatever things those girls want to do. A crush? I did have last time. The first one, is someone I even cannot imagine how the things work that I come to like that 'whatever' guy. He's someone who bothers me always. The innocent me (opps, well I do, what comes to my mind is just test and play). Just call him 'D' okay? Mr. D always bothers me when I was playing with the girls. He can suddenly try to push me down when I was in the stairs. I cried that time because I hate that kind of games. Then he comes to bother me again for giving me his handkerchief. That time I told my mon about being bother like that.
Unexpectedly, I come to like him bothering me, trying so hard to get his attention (stupid me). But well, nothing happened till 5th grade.
I met somebody, a nice guy in my school in 6th grade. He lives in my area and he's my neighbour.
We come to school together and go home together. Loving how we can tease each other and one day we become together, but sadly, I realize that I am still not ready for that and we broke up for only one day. Haha. Stupid girl. But I cherish this happening as one of my serious one.
In my high school, there's one guy who makes me cry hardly. He's one of my best friend back then. But again, no serious feelings, no attachment. Before graduation, I promise myself, I won't cry for a guy anymore. My highschool has been pretty boring. No guys at all, just from another crush to another one.
Till I come to China for a winter camp for one month and I met somebody there. That time, I saw his back in front of me. He's walking and I asked somebody there how old he is. We can just call him 'A', A is one year younger than me. I never thought that I would have something to do with this guy. This guy is like a 'komedi putar' where he could make my feeling suddenly would be high and down.
That time, before christmas, I was feeling not really well and go to sleep early. I woke up and our room was cery crowded by those little brats who play inside the room.
I went to the hallway to see what's happening and saw Mr. A, then I want to go to my room again, when I was going to open the door, he was running and blocking me. We saw each other and in the end, we smiled and introduced ourself.
He came to me as someone who can tell stories about me, he saw my hand and told me what kind of person I am. I just take it as a joke anyway. Till, we have to go down for xmas eve party. That night was so cold. I went down, we had an event and after than, Mr. A who saw me being cold, suddenly holds my hand and ran away. I just found out that he was running to his room and give me a jacket. That time I am seriously speechless, how come the guy I was asking my friend earlier suddenly showing this side to me?
The event was over and Mr. A suddenly ran to me, asking me number and said he had something to do right now, but he wants my number. I gave my friend's number cos I don't have one.
He then messaged me, a very long one, saying he feels something for me. I bet that's a joke and told him that we should take it slowly. The next day, we hang out together and many thing happened, even a misunderstanding.
The night before we come back to our home country, he showed up in front of my door and talked to me. He use that trick, a very lousy one, but I was catch onto him. He then hugged me tightly. Dunno what happened there cos I was shocked. And goodbye. That's what teenagers were doing last time. Nothin serious. Just being friends.
Then another Mr. A, Mr. I, another Mr.A again who make me ups and down. Nothing serious till now.
Well... full of color and I am tired of that.
Gonna love myself first!
