Who Are You Looking For?

this kind of question keeps popping up my mind recently.
who am I looking for? what kind of criteria am I trying to find out?
why is it no good enough person around me?
is it because what I am asking for too much?

I never like the idea of getting older. As you age much, you even get more mature.
Men are like wine and  women are like ripped raisin.
but as we all are getting older each year, I couldn't even do anything neither have any more things to object.

I have been looking for someone who has many things to talk about with me, regardless of the time we will spend together. It's either 10 years, 20 years or even more than 50 years.
Because I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't talk anything with me. It's very scary to just live by yourself and the only way you will communicate is by having this kind of conversation, "I love you, please give me money..."

But, this doesn't mean, that person has to be outspoken or talkative.
It was really a minus point for me. I just want somebody who can share anything with me, specially.

Seriously, I might be looking for someone who is perfect enough all these time. However, I know, no one is ever perfect, nor can understand me completely. I just want somebody who can understand me to certain extend. It's not simply easy to get what you want, but when I could wish somebody like that coming over to pick me, I would love to wish something impossible till reality break me apart.
If I got what I am longing for, that would be a real bonus. If not, then that might not be mine.

Thus, there are certain criteria in which I have to set up first:

• That person should have responsibility sense. Responsibility here is not something you might have thought and it is not limited only to work only. I just mean the responsibility of himself in his lifetime. He has to get into his sense, what kind of person he wants to be in five years from now? what thing he wants to accomplish later? does he have some passion, vision and mission? I feel annoyed when time is chasing us, yet you still don't know what you wanna do and still slacking off for the past few months. In my opinion, that kind of attitude represents very little appreciation and respect about time. Time is a very precious thing, you might never get back a second you have missed. 
• That person need to be able to accept challenge. You might think I was asking a lot, but seriously, this is all for you, for your better future, I will keep challenge you and won't lock you down in my own world, because you have lots of possibilities out there. Explore more when you are still young and full of energy, darling. You have to be focus on what you wanna get. Such as love, if you are just going to chase me temporarily, for what should I care about you? 
• That person's personality should not be tough, because I am tough to handle. I am very stubborn person, yet I still want the best for you, darling. If both of us are tough, our lives later might not be going well, though I would still learn how to behave with the right attitude. I hope you would be able to comfort, guide and lose to me when I am upset over small or big things and care enough for me. The same amount you did to me, I would do the same of even more for you, darling. 
• That person hopefully is a family-oriented person who believes in God. My religion is Buddhism, thus allowing me to believe in karma and other things. When a person has his beliefs, I believe he still has something to be afraid of. A family-oriented person would be able to thank his family for staying beside himself and cherish them. This doesn't mean others would not do the same. It's just, when we both have the same beliefs, that would be better. I hope in whatever he believes, he will appreciate and still cherish me, even though later, after I am giving birth, my body is not as beautiful as before and my wrinkles looks even more vividly on my face. Will you still understand me and forgive me for not being able to look like before?

That's all, pretty simple right? But I just haven't met anyone like that. Hopefully later, that guy will come and this is what I am going to say when we are getting married:

"From today on, you’re mine

I want to slowly approach you

Trust me

Everything will be great

Who else in this world will think of you as much as I do?

From today until always, I’m yours

Always, I’m yours

I can tell what’s up just by looking at your face

Even if it takes hours, I will listen to you...

Let’s promise to make time for each other

Promise to never let go of each other’s hands

Only stay by my side, from today on

The day we first met

It was still so clear

Just like now, I’ll protect you

Even if I tell you more

It won’t be a waste

Trust me

Everything will be great...."

Cheers, Lishea