A True Meaning of Friendship

I may say that I have friends, not so many, but indeed I have several groups which I can considered to be part of it. Personally, since I was in primary school, I don't like the idea of having a group. It was like putting yourself only closed to several people, while I like talking to everyone and seeking for attention (not to say I don't). But, having a group means that you have to stick with that group all day at school. I end up having very few close friends which we become friend due to a more intimate relationship. It happened that we connect with each other and not in a group situation. It was merely a one-to-one approach.

However, as I get older and entered university life outside my comfort zone, I found out that having a group you can hang out always every weekend is something that I really want to have. While I finally had it, I really feel blessed having several people whom we all connect to and call it as a group. But this doesn't mean that I lose the other friendship which I had built in the past.

The thing that change over the time is that I realize that by entering 25 years old, you can't really count the number of close friends you have. You now classify them by acquaintances, friends, best friends, best friends forever or brother and sister for life.  I realized that quality is far away more important that just a mere number. Besides, you should be able to choose a friend who can supports and gives you good and positive energy vibes. That way, you can grow in a much better way.

While I was pondering much what is the true meaning of friends, I finally got the answers. A good friendship will allow you to look back to yourself and reflect back on what you can improve in your life. A good friend may not always compliment you, but they will surely supports you. It might not be in a good word, sometimes they push you from the back by giving you a slap on the face. But, there is clearly a difference between giving you a slap on the face sometimes or criticize you for everything you did always. So, be clear about it, because keep living in that situation won't even help your mental state and healthy.

I believe that a good friendship won't compare what you have done with what he/she has done. Comparing is not a healthy friendship and jealousy often leads to a negative feelings and bad mental health. A good friendship would support you either in good or bad times. They may give you advice which may not what you expect, but they won't compare, instead wanting you to improve. They may understand your situation, be considerate of you and care of you. Sometimes, when you had a constant fight with you friends, then consider yourself to get out from that friendship, because it is not worth the try. Why are you trying so hard to be friend with someone who doesn't even consider your situation and always pick a fight with you?

What Has Changed in Friendship Over Years

I have a lot of girlfriends for over the years and some of them stayed outside the country. It's been a long time not to talk about friendship and this topic seems to be one of my favorite topic to discuss about. As the world keeps moving forward, our lives also rotates in usual time and place with our own activities and priorities. 

It's true that we are growing apart on the surface, not because we do not care for each other anymore, but more likely because we have been too busy with our own necessities and priorities. And of course certain things would have changed because we are all growing up;

1. The connection is lost once in a while

As we live in different world, cultures and values affect most of our daily lives, specially the way we think and solve something. I grew up in a country with East cultures and values, meanwhile my other friend lives in a Westernized country with more open way of thinking. We became friends before because we both like Taiwanese dramas and that's our first connection. But as we live in different area and surroundings, we are exposed with different thing and our first connection was broken down. It's not that we don't like it anymore, but since we are so busy, the time for that is very limited. Sometimes I do wonder what made us as a friend since the connection is lost once in a while....

2. Communication becomes a rare thing

Due to different time zone, we would rarely talk. Different timing most likely to be one of the reasons. But that's an excuse actually, because if you care for the other person, no matter the difference is, you would surely reply the messages. But that's different thing when you forget to reply because you are so busy with every day life.

3. But your bond grows stronger

But when you confronts for what has happened, it only takes about few minutes to feel alright. She knows how to please you and your bond seems to grow even stronger than before. Because sometimes fighting is another way of showing love.

Cheers ~